It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas!

And the prettiest sight you'll see is the sweater that will be at your own thrift store!

 Like this one. I was perusing the isles the other day, seeing what goods the old thrift shop had to offer and I came across this gem. I think somebody got their needles crossed. I mean, I'm as proud to be an American as the next, uh, American, but really? I needed a tacky sweater for a party, but I couldn't bring myself to purchase this one. Now that I'm looking at it again, I kind of wish I had. It's not like there isn't precedence for it...

 moviegoods
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I mean, fourth of Ju...uh, Christmas, yeah, Happy Chri, er Merry Christmas!

Still, the only kind of person I can really see wearing it is this guy:

Marielynn flickr

Then there's this. I'm not sure, but I think maybe Santa got into someone's stash of 'special' milk and cookies. "The candy canes, they're like...whoa. It's like everything's moving in slow motion!" 

I did buy a couple of sweaters, but they're for another blog. In the meantime, let's see what the interwebs has to offer...

Herb of DC
Bonne chance outdoing this one from Grand Pari.  A little wine, the city of lights, this sweater, and before the end of the night, you'll be asking some attractive stranger Souhaitez-vous crochet avec moi ce soir?

micechat
On the picture it says "Tacky xmas sweater delight '08" however, the web address tells me it's actually "super-mega-monster-tacky-delight" which I think is more appropriate. So kawaii! Mickey,  I have to say I am a little disappointed in your offering. You can do better than that, just look at the crazy get ups these anime-girls-come-to-life have found! Pull it together. Are you a man or a mou...oh.
(I just realized, as a child, I owned and happily wore the exact same sweater as orange-hair girl. Wow.)

tackylighttour
It's like I can see the future movie of this guy's life being cast now. "And in the part of Robbie, the lonely, socially inept, yet naively charming intern, is Steve Carell."

themoviemind
I need to watch this...like, now.

How is it already the 8th of December!? It seems like only yesterday that I was writing about hideous turkey hats. 

I Just Want To Gobble These Up!

Welcome to The Home Shopping Blog Network Channel. Today, we're highlighting the finest offerings in Thanksgiving fashion. If there's one thing the perfect host or hostess knows, it's that setting the perfect table is paramount at this annual feast. However, the china plates and crystal goblets aren't the only things that should sparkle when everyone gathers 'round the table. As any good party planner knows, a properly festooned outfit makes his or her guest feel not only welcome, but cherished. It says "I care enough about you to bedazzle myself with the finest appliques and seasonal designs that money can buy." And nothing says it best...like a vest.

Herb of DC

 Few things can truly enhance the beauty of an immaculately crafted sweater vest, but we here at  The Home Shopping Blog Network Channel think eight dangly-footed turkeys dressed as Pilgrims, and copious amounts of rainbow piping adds a subtle and elegant touch. Order our "Dangle de Ocho" sweater today! Call today!*

You've missed out on this gem.

Speaking of subtle and elegant and for that matter, copious, here's another sweater vest to tempt you with its visual display. Oh! I've just been informed that we've sold out of our "Double Cornucopia of Delight" design. $15.96 and it could have been yours.

Hanzipan

Our next special is something for the younger crowd. Our tunic length sweater, "Turkey Knit Jumper," offers the whimsy of an elementary school drawing with its bold colors and stylized, macrocephalic turkey. It pairs perfectly with both youthful discord and a Justin Bieber haircut. It's a steal at only £69.99 or $135.00.

Thanks Jimmy Fallon, for having Cory Cavin write this blog for me.  For the person who wants everything...all at once, jam packed on a sweater, we offer you what we like to call "The Farmer's Basket." The discriminating customer will appreciate both the festive seasonal images such as the turkey, pie, and pilgrim's hat, but also the year-round wearability of this delightful piece thanks to the multi-colored geometric shapes and spring flowers. The completely arbitrary placement also shows that you're a free spirit! Order now!*  Loom Lady As a special gift to you, our customers here at The Home Shopping Blog Network Channel, we offer the expert knitters, and only the expert knitters, among you the opportunity to make your own pilgrim-turkey hat. Click the Loom Lady link for instructions! For everyone else, consider purchasing* our "Just Like Mom Used to Make" turkey beanie below! Daily Ridiculous  You'll be the envy of all of your friends and family with your fine display of Thanksgiving pride. It also works well at Christmas and anytime you need a makeshift viking helmet. Buy three or more to take advantage of the family discount!* Sweater Surgery So when you sit down to your Thanksgiving table, surrounded by loved ones, don't forget to give thanks for the bounty you are about to receive, and for the stylish knitwear offered by The Home Shopping Blog Network Channel. Doesn't that look good? "Mmmm! Save the neck for me Clark!" Miss Knitsetsy Enjoy...

Yarn Over Mama

...But don't eat too much; you'll want to save room for dessert!

Brought to you by The Home Shopping Blog Network Channel. To order, call (555) 555-5555 or simply email your order to youvegottobekiddingme@fakecompany.com

*The Home Shopping Blog Network Channel is not a real company and does not sell any of these items...though, somebody might, and in some cases, actually did.  If you mistakenly thought otherwise, you need to get off of the internet. However, if you're not the most gullible person ever and are still online, check the links to see some cool craft projects. 

OH, AND BLOGGER, THE NEW EDITOR IS JUST RIDICULOUSLY BAD. FIX IT!